I can see the sun outside this morning. I don't know if I can really express how happy this makes me. Obviously it's not Spring yet, but it's closer... and that's a plus. I'm looking forward to nothing more than being able to walk around outside barefoot.

Bored again. Bored bored bored. So here I go to LJ.

I want to get together people to go to like, TGI's or Applebee's sometime.. or something. After financial aid checks come in the mail of course.

I have a French quiz and a Psych exam tomorrow, neither of which I've studied for. Instead I'm going to sit here in front of my computer being lazy and listening to Dar Williams.

( Revenge of the ex-boyfriends )

I still haven't decided if I want to make this post public or not. I'm not sure how much I care. Hung out with Judy today, we walked around downtown trying to find Jamba Juice... when it turns out we were like a block away from it in the beginning. I think she might have got the wrong message with me texting her/Alex last weekend. I don't think she's "in love with my boyfriend" or anything like that. I said I didn't like them cuddling whenever they're together, and that I didn't want to talk to her at the time (I wanted to talk to Alex, but she was responding on his phone).

I guess I've just been really irritable lately. Such is part of being a woman though, right? I've been annoyed at pretty much everyone for some reason or other. And of course it's the people I love the most that I spend the most time with. So I apologize ahead of time to Alex, Chris, Cece and Shawn if you guys piss me off for no good reason, and I take it out on you. Or... if I just take my frustrations out on you anyway. Besides Thursday night I don't think I'll be doing much socializing over the next few days, though.

I suppose that's it for now. Just enjoying some music from Boondock Saints, looking forward to the Twins playing again.. and just being chill. Night.

Revised because I'm bored waiting for Cece to get here. I suppose I'll keep the original list, and just bold the ones I actually think are important.

( 102 things guys should know about girls )

I'm very frustrated right now. I guess, that might not be the word I'm looking for. I've been sick since... Wednesday? Or something. My headache has been hanging around since Monday non-stop. My stomach was acting up Wednesday pretty badly. And a cough since Wednesday night. Every time I lay down and try and breathe through my mouth I start coughing, but my nose is so plugged up I can't breathe that way either. So I keep waking up every few hours (after I finally DO manage to fall asleep), effecting my sleep very negatively.

Classes are going well though. I still love my French teacher, and the people in my class. My closest friend in that class, Karen, is going to propose to her girlfriend soon. Which is very exciting, I'm happy for her. :) Psych is alright, don't know anyone. Spent the first day talking to some woman, Fray, and this guy Robert. Still sitting next to Robert, occasionally talk. Otherwise just enjoying the content of the class. Stress Management is fun so far, it REALLY helps having it with Chris. Pretty much my favorite class. Comp Lit is after that, the class I have with Alex. Problem? Too many technical terms for stuff I already know, and I don't like the professor. I would have switched if it hadn't been for Alex in the class.

There is/was the whole thing of Alex moving into a house with Nate, Louise, Adrian, Deven and Richard. I had considered moving in with them too, but with the way things have worked out recently I can say I'm definitely NOT moving in with them. Nate (who I might have met ONCE) doesn't like me... so I know it's based solely on what other people have said about me (not likely positive - obviously). And apparently Deven doesn't like me/ my personality and the ideas that I hold about men and them being toys. He obviously doesn't know me, since that's not the ONLY thing I think about men... (though it is a big part). [[But really... that brings up a WHOLE NEW topic that I'm not going to get into, about men complaining when women get too clingy and emotionally attached, yet if we're "too unattached" they get mad about that, too.]] So Alex might still move in there. I told him to not base his decision on me, as they are his friends and have been there longer than I have. I understand my place as a girlfriend, when it comes to being compared with friends. But I told him I also wouldn't move in with him there, but I would hang out as much as I can stand to.

My plans for today are going to school in about 20 min. Getting through French (somehow - miraculously). Then coming back home and probably going to sleep. Sad existence, but I'm so freaking exhausted. Hope everyone else is doing well in school. Much love. [EDIT]: Not going to school, can't move. Going back to bed.

( Because it's kinda funny )

Help!
I am looking for suggestions of depressing movies! I want to do a marathon, but only have a few I actually want to watch out of the list following.

The ones not in parentheses are ones I have seen that are on the list.

The ones that are in parentheses I haven't, but have been suggested on a Google search.

In no particular order...

Saving Private Ryan
Requiem For A Dream
Kids
Pay It Forward
Brian's Song
Sleepers
Butterfly Effect
(21 Grams)
(Grave of the Fireflies)
(The Mist)
(Life is Beautiful)
(House of Sand and Fog)
(Dancer In The Dark)
(Pan's Labyrinth)
(The Joy Luck Club)
(The Last King of Scotland)
(The Hours)
(Boys Don't Cry)
(American History X)

HEY EVERYONE!

WHO: YOU!!!

WHAT: My mom is moving all of her stuff from a storage garage to her new apartment.

WHERE: 2011 3rd Ave. (3rd & Franklin)

WHEN: Saturday June 14th, after 1pm.

There will be food and pop. Since my family helped move her stuff into the storage garage this weekend, they're not going to help 2 weeks from now, so we would both REALLY appreciate your help! Otherwise we only have a few of us to move everything in one day.

QUESTIONS:

Leave a comment OR:

612.481.2444

aluckysoul@msn.com

Or send me a message on Facebook.

If you are someone, or know someone, who needs to move out and hasn't yet found a place, Kristi and I [maybe Michelle & Ricky] need another roomie. we're looking at a house on 34th and Harriet (and it's looking very likely that we'll take it.)

If you're interested, pleasepleasepleaseplease contact me, either by commenting on this post or by sending me a message via email (aluckysoul@msn.com). If you're not interested, but know someone who might be, please put me in contact with them! We're looking for someone reliable and trustworthy, so any help would be awesome.

You know you're from Minnesota when....

The weather is usually 80% of your conversation.

When you say "down south" you're referring to Iowa.

You call highways "freeways."

Snow tires came standard on your car.

75% of your graduating high school class went to the University of Minnesota.

"Perkins" was the only hangout option in high school.

You assume when you say "The Cities" people know where you're talking about.

You can list all the "-dales."

People from other states love to hear you say words with "o"s in them.

In a conversation you've heard someone say "yah sure, you betcha" and you didn't laugh.

You hate the movie "Fargo" but realize you and your entire family have that same accent.

You get mad at people who think Fargo is in Minnesota.

You know what Mille Lacs is and how to spell it.

You know what "uff-da" means and how to use it properly.

Nothing gets you madder than seeing a Green Bay sticker on a MN car.

The only reason you go to Wisconsin is to get fireworks.

You're a loyal Target shopper.

You've frozen your tongue on a metal handrail before.

( You or someone in your family owns an ice house, a snowmobile, and/or a 4 wheel drive vehicle... and more )

Soo... my weekend is kinda confusing and messed up. My great uncle died yesterday, so my mom may or may not go to the funeral on Saturday. And my dad's car window is broken so he may or may not go to Granite Falls to get it fixed. SO I may have two parents, or I may have no parents. Either way I get to stay home because I made it clear I already had plans and I am NOT going anywhere.

EDIT: My mom's car broke down. She's not going anywhere for a while. :\

I'm almost talking to Max.. kind of.. not really. So I have talked to him, I'm just not doing it on any sort of regular or semi-regular basis. Do I even want to talk to him? I'm not sure.

So as for life in general... I'm okay. I'm not well, but I'm not as bad as I've been before. I'm not sure how I got to the place I'm at right now. Nothing is quite right and something is missing. I just don't know what it is. But whatever it is.. it's kind of screwing me over. I've lost so much motivation in the past few weeks I don't even know anymore.

I wish... I had people I could talk to. I mean I know I have my freinds, but they all have some bias or another. Whether they hate someone I need to discuss, or if they don't want to hear about my past, if they think what they have to say is more important so I never even get a chance, or if they simply don't care. Simply put. I have no one I can talk to about everyone and everything. Even my best friends.

Because I'm so ... scared of confrontation I'm having issues telling people what I relly need to. I don't know if anything is going to help me with what I need to say to these people. I guess I'll have to work on that.

So I'm at Steph's office. I really wish I had something meaningful to say, but I really don't. It's about noon and I woke up a few hours ago. At some point I will head over to Max's house (when and if I figure out where he lives), and then after that I'll go to Crissy's (whose house I only recognize by sight - I didn't actually know his address until last night). Haha. Anyone remember Alahna Robinson? She's on MySpace, I'm thinking I should maybe get ahold of her. Hm.
Up up and away.

So I suppose I could actually update LJ every once in a while. Don't get me wrong, I read it at least three times every day, I just don't update it as much as I used to. Then again, that seems to go for a lot of other people, too. I'm at Stephie's for the night to hang out and watch cable TV. But Kelly is watching some Western so I'm letting him have the TV until I get bored with the internet, then I'll pester him to change the channel. Or who knows, maybe the movie will be over by then. Anyhoo there's a lot less time left of break, and a lot more stuff that I have to do. Astrology project being part of that. Blah. And cleaning my room. I still have plenty of time to hang out, thankfully.
I think I had a point to this entry at one time besides updating 'cause I haven't in a while. Whatever thought that was is gone now, though. So I think I'll just update again later.
Or IM me on AIM: RandomlyClueless.
<3 Me

So Christmas with my parents was good. Excellent, actually. I get to do it all over again with my dad's side of the family tomorrow. Though I don't think it will be as fun as tonight was. We basically spent all night playing Monopoly, which ended up with a tie between me and my mom when my dad finally decided to leave. :P

I got my mom crack for Xmas. Also known as WoW (World of Warcraft). And my dad a few books and a movie. I got a camera phone, a book, cd & a CHIA pet. OMGZ it's awesome. :P Monopoly was the best part though, and my parents getting along. Like.. the entire night. Sometimes I really love what the holidays can do to people.

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays everyone!

As a request to update.. and I have nothing better to do, I'm in the Media Center. I also keep mixing up my words and putting them in the wrong order in my head, so if it comes out that way on the screen, too, I apologize.
I wish we could listen to music in the MC, I just wanna sit in here and read all 3rd hour. It would be nice, especially since my iPod is fixed and I have a song stuck in my head. This is where I come for third hour (Senior Review) now. It works out fine for me, since I still know what's going on in math, and I have a B. I should find an extra book so I can do the homework. I need to make a vow to myself, though, that if I start doing worse in math, I'll need to start going to class again.
The weekend was... good. Interesting to say the least. Haha. Friday.. I don't really remember what I did right now. Uh.. I went to MOA and Southdale to get my iPod fixed with (at different times) Dad, Misha, Christof, Laura and Steph. Saturday I went to MOA with Katrina and met Christof and Laura there. Saw the Pursuit of Haopyness, which was good. Then I went to my dads house and did absolutly nothing until Sunday the next day when Michelle and I went to Kowalskies and put up Christmas decorations. After that Max came over and we watched City of Angels. It was a fun weekend.
I had enough money for FL, then the trip went up 30$ over the weekend. And Misha might not (probably) can't go (unless we convince her mum otherwise), so the price shoots up more. So I'm gunna look up other weekends, and if that doesn't work out, well then I have over 300$ to blow on random crap. Lol.
Wish there was Mozilla on this computer, but I don't have the access to download it. Which sucks, it would make looking up prices for tickets so much easier. So I'm gunna open a few new windows and do it that way.
Cheers.

GRRRR
usa/english tunnels are down. Need different proxy. Help?

While rollerblading to SA I realized how out of shape I am. I guess I'll have to put some air into my bike tires and start biking at the lake before the snow comes round. (I would run but it hurts my knees and lower back too much.)

My plans for this weekend got really screwed up. Not necessarily canceled, but re-arranged. Everything is kind of out of order. Oh well. So for right now, I have absolutly nothing to do. Tonight I do, and almost all of tomorrow I think I do. I guess I could get my homework and stuff done. But I think I plan on baking today (which is why I went to SA and bought eggs).

For all you PostSecret viewers out there, you might have already seen this, but for those of you who haven't (check out http://postsecret.com), and look at this:
http://thewhitehatpeople.blogspot.com

How can it be so impossibly hard to get through an entire day of school?
Even when I've dreaded tests and undone homework, this pure exhaustion taking over me is handicapping me much more than petty school fears.
I don't even know why I can't do this. I'm just so tired, but I slept fine and for the normal amount of time that I usually do. Ate my meals, I don't think I'm that sick, so I don't know what's wrong with me.
I don't even want to go home and sleep, I just need something to do. I don't have anything to do with my time anymore, and I think not doing something is exhausting me more than doing something does.
I'm deciding to cut Joe and his friends out of my worries, and I'm going to focus on other things. Unless anything else happens to bring him/them up, I'm just not going to think about it anymore, except for as something that's happened in my past and is done and gone.
In all hopes, tomorrow will be a better day. <3

So life's looking a little better. A few things contribute to that. But mainly, I like a boy. Tee hee. And he likes me back. A nice one, too. This should be good.
Saving money for Florida is sucking, though. 'Cause I have no money for Xmas presents and such. But the trip is looking less likely to happen, which sucks, too. I hope it still does.
I mildly enjoy Econ class. Actually, I do enjoy it, the homework just REALLY makes it that much worse of a class to endure. As of now, I only have 4-ish assignments to make up. But I need to do it by next Thursday. Which will take a suprisingly large amount of concentration. I hate Social Studies classes.
I wish we could easily get onto MySpace from school. It would make things much better. Haha. I love my online addictions; I.E. LiveJournal, MySpace, Facebook, PostSecret, VGCats... etc.
My mom excused me from skipping 4th hour yesterday. I honestly told her why I skipped, where I went and with who. She was upset about it last night. But this morning she came into my room and said "So, what do you want me to tell the school about you skipping yesterday so I can excuse you?". I was a bit baffled, but it's actually cool because she said she understands and is happy that I respected her enough to tell her the truth, etc.
Time to go read Hawksong. I need to buy Wolfcry, which is the new 4th book in my series. I'm so excited. I love life.

So. Joe is still ignoring me, and avoiding me (I think). I'm not sure why though. He's the one who said he still wanted to be friends. Maybe he changed his mind without telling me?
Got upset after third hour, so I went to Christof's. Also went to second lunch and hung out with Kristi, Misha and Fratz. Said hi to Joe at one point and he said hi back, but then turned away. What the hell did I do?
Meeting Kyle in the MC soon, hope he shows up. Heh. Then getting picked up by Christof and going to his place with Kristi.
Love and agony ~The Girl

Joe ignored me again today. I was upset.
Group was intense. I cried.
Joe broke up with me. I cried.
Explained it to Christof. I cried.
Told my mom. Cried some more.
I'm going upstairs. To do what?
Cry some more.
Some days are good. Some are bad.
Guess which one this is.

EDIT:
I got my SAT scores and they're HORRIBLE.
Cried some more.